The ten Largest, Most Loser-ish Moments of the Yr So Far

It’s time to reclaim The Largest Loser.

Throughout the aughts and past, this phrase grew to become a recognizable nickname for the one who unnaturally dropped the very best variety of kilos throughout an inhumane weight-loss competitors. Thank God that’s over — it’s cancelled.

Now, it’s as much as us to take over this idea and make it significant, sensible, and relevant. Let’s begin this mission off proper by providing to you the ten greatest, most loser-ish moments of the yr thus far. These incidents have made us cringe, scream, and/or shut our laptops in disbelief. Celebrities, movie studios, common Joes, and authorities entities alike have been displaying their complete asses the primary half of 2025, and it’s crucial that they be referred to as out for it. Ain’t that the American approach?

Because the legend goes, comic Katt Williams opened a portal in January 2024 throughout his dialog with former athlete-turned-aspiring “journalist” Shannon Sharpe. Whereas speaking to Sharpe about his Hollywood friendships, Williams made a hilarious, however salient level: “You having an unnatural allegiance to losers is just not such as you.” This is how we ought to be transferring. If you happen to see ‘em, level ‘em out.

Many of the moronic offenses listed beneath had been self-inflicted situations of stupidity. Different moments had been simply mishandled, and mishandled, and mishandled, till the purpose of no return. Whatever the particular model of brainlessness, the next losers are the largest of 2025 thus far. If you happen to occur to make an look on this record: Take into account this an invite to get your shit collectively.

The (Ex)-Husband of That Girl Who Actually Most popular Romeo Santos

Do you keep in mind that episode of The Boondocks when neighborhood cornball Tom Dubois rattling close to misplaced his spouse to Usher? Not solely was it primarily based on a real story, but it surely additionally grew to become an eerily comedian harbinger of how marriages might be examined within the presence of celebrities.

One of many wildest examples of a fame-unraveled relationship got here in January, by the hands (and lips) of Romeo Santos of standard bachata group Aventura. Whereas performing within the Dominican Republic, the band introduced a fan onstage, and my God, did she have a mission. The stan, named Miriam Cruz, planted a number of massive ones on Santos, who, regardless of his inclination to unfold kisses all over the place he goes, didn’t seem like probably the most receptive to tonguing her down.

“I’ve to acknowledge that this achievement got here at a really excessive value: the breakup of my 10-year marriage,” Cruz wrote in a now-deleted social media assertion. No shit? Chatter on-line suggests the connection was already on the rocks, and it appears Cruz’s husband had formally had sufficient. Within the phrases of the Boondocks waiter who witnessed Tom’s marriage slip via his fingers in actual time: “Sorry, man. Wouldn’t let that shit occur to me, thouuugh.”

Drake and the By no means-Ending L

Drake already took the heftiest L doable all all through final yr. To make it even worse, since November, he has been showcasing his proclivity for litigiousness, and every replace solely sounds extra pathetic: “Kendrick is asking me names once more, put him in day out!”

Drake carried that massive loser vitality immediately into 2025. First, he introduced that his Anita Max Win tour in Australia would kick off the identical evening as Tremendous Bowl LIX — you understand, the one the place Kendrick Lamar lyrically beat his ass so dangerous in entrance of 133.5 million people who the tattle-telling twerp whined to his legal professionals? Once more?? All we’d like now could be for Drake to sue the NBA for taking part in Kendrick whereas chopping to business, and Conan O’Brien for his “Not Like Us” joke at this yr’s Oscars.

As if that weren’t sufficient, Drake has regularly supported morally questionable streamers like Adin Ross, DJ Akademiks, and xQc, furthering his trajectory towards the incel manosphere. In that vein, Kai Cenat, the chief of Gen-Z influencers, ​revealed that Drake can be selflessly (derogatory) making a gift of lots of of 1000’s of {dollars} throughout a livestream scheduled for June 12 — the identical evening as Kendrick Lamar and SZA’s first Toronto cease on their Grand Nationwide tour. The stream was postponed, however clearly, Drake had each proper to be pressed: Followers from his hometown gave Ok-Dot a two-minute standing ovation after he carried out his monster diss observe, and even requested an encore (which was not obliged). With each improvement, he proves once more that Kendrick was proper: He actually is just not like us.

Now You See a Nazi, Now You Don’t

Regardless of punk rock classics just like the Useless Kennedys’ “Nazi Punks Fuck Off,” a number of losers within the scene haven’t gotten the memo. That features a licensed weirdo who attended the Punk Rock Bowling & Music Pageant in Las Vegas in Might. As an alternative of inconspicuously mixing in and having fun with the soothing sounds of bands like FLAG and The Damned, this witless marvel boldly walked across the pageant carrying a T-shirt displaying the SS brand adopted by Nazi Germany within the Thirties. His parade didn’t final lengthy, as a extensively circulated video confirmed different attendees responding to the person’s unabashed fascism with forceful shoves and a flurry of blows. As safety escorted Sir Lose-A-Lot off the premises, folks may very well be heard shouting, “No fucking Nazis!” and “Get out of our scene!” There’s an vital lesson right here: If the Nazi punks received’t fuck off by themselves, then different punks will assist them to get the job completed.